Ma Bell Will No Longer Be Reaching Out And Touching Me

Terry Sprague | Jan 21, 2012 | Comments 4

I turned 67 late last year. Does this mean I am now getting old and crotchety?

I was sitting in the living room last week, watching television and suddenly realized, I can’t do this anymore. This is all pure crap. The News is depressing. Country Canada long ago morphed into something unrecognizable. It is no longer country, or rural, or resembles any of the fine programming that it once offered. There are probably over 30 music stations, only one of which I occasionally listen to, and the rest of the 200+ stations have duplicate programming of repeats, French stations that I can’t understand, sports which I
never watch, Pay Per View that requires me to pay even more money on top of what I pay monthly, cartoons, and raunchy triple X sex stations that have exorbitant fees attached. Even the Young and the Restless, a program that really should be listed with the sex stations and accompanied by a cover charge, has deteriorated well beyond what I thought it was capable of doing. There is not one living soul in Genowa City who has not been in bed with everyone else in that city.

Next morning, I poured myself a tall glass of grapefruit juice, calmed my nerves, and thought I’d try again. That’s when the Error 005 message came up, the third time in as many months, telling me that I was not subscribed to the few mysterious channels that remained on my screen. In the past month, I have called three different times about the recurring problem, talked to three different technicians, none of whom I could clearly understand, who gave me three different reasons for the problem. Each time has required over 60 minutes of fiddling and following instructions, and repeated requests from me “can you speak more slowly please”. The last time after spending a half hour being led through another ceremony of menu commands, I shut off the TV for the required 30 minutes as instructed, and turned it back on again. The error message still hung ominously on the screen.

So, I cancelled my account, only this time, I couldn’t locate a single, breathing, human being to speak with and vent my frustrations. Only a recorded voice who, ironically, spoke perfect English, asking me to state what I needed. I said rather brusquely, “Cancel my account!” Back came a recorded voice stating, “Cancelling Bell TV account”, and a reminder that a simple flick of a switch at their end would take 30 days, meaning yet another invoice would likely appear in my mailbox for non-service. It reminded me of my former propane company charging me $200.00 last year to come out and haul away THEIR tank.

The big 52-inch screen now remains black, used only for DVD movies. Evenings are quiet, and the time spent wondering if Sharon isn’t out of her mind marrying Victor, is spent reading. If I dare go down that road again, I will be returning to television’s roots, by using a simple antenna. Surely there must be someone in the County who erects TV antennas and who can speak English.

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About the Author: Terry Sprague became interested in nature at an early age. "Growing up on the family farm at Big Island, 12 miles north of Picton, on the shore of the beautiful Bay of Quinte, I was always interested in the natural world around me. During my elementary school days at the small one-room school I attended on Big Island, I received considerable encouragement from the late Marie Foster, my teacher in Grades 6 through 8. Her home was a short distance from where I lived and through the years she was responsible for developing my interest in birds. The late Phil Dodds, a former editor with the Picton Gazette, also a great nature enthusiast, suggested I undertake a nature column - a column I have submitted weekly since 1965. The column has since expanded to the Napanee Beaver and the Tweed News. Life has been good, and through the years I have enjoyed working with such nature related agencies as Glenora Fisheries Research as a resource technician, Sandbanks Provincial Park as a park interpreter and Quinte Conservation as a naturalist and outdoor events coordinator. As a nature interpreter, currently working from my home office, I now create and lead numerous interpretive events in the area and offer indoor audio/visual presentations to interested groups. Could one who is interested in nature have enjoyed a more exhilarating period in the work force?" Terry's website is www.naturestuff.net

Ma Bell Will No Longer Be Reaching Out And Touching Me

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