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Spooky fan cam best part of PA3

So there are all these new formulaic films coming out with new formulas for recycling the same old same old. Talk about wheels within wheels.
It all started with The Blair Witch Project which wasn’t a movie, wasn’t watchable and wasn’t even renting real estate on the block known as good.
All the famous horror shows have had multiple sequels Halloween, Chuckie, Nightmare On Elm Street, Steven Harper’s Cabinet, and now  Paranormal Activity 3. And yes you guessed it, it’s a prequel. Let me explain how a prequel works. If you have a decent movie that tells a semi-interesting story, then when you want to milk the rotting corpse of that film for further profits; explain how that story came to be. That’s a prequel.
Paranormal Activity 1 was quirky and mildly interesting. There were no previews Their entire marketing campaign involved showing an audience jumping in their seats.
For some reason it never dawned on us that the audience was hired to jump out of their seat. At least not until we saw the film and went Huh????
I liked the first one  a bit. It had some creepy moments.
There’s always that Ouija Board drawing the poor innocents in.
However the ending was so silly that it ended up on my ‘Oh Come On’ List. Search the archives if you don’t know what that’s all about.
PA2 was terrible. It made money so I’m still a big fan but it really was terrible.
More choppy shots, more spooky entity moving about the house, and more goofy story lines.
Now it’s PA3
Our story so far. Katey and Kristie are sisters living with their mom and her dude in 1988.
As is required in all of these films, someone has to record all of these shenanigans.
In this case it’s the dude.
The real star of the show isn’t the girls, who are quite cute and relatively unspoiled by the trauma that lies ahead. He’s a bit of a doofus and mom of course sees nothing really worong with his video obsession. No the real star is the camera mounted on a  fan.
Pan left
Pan right
It’s so cheesy it’s fun.
Toby, the thing that lives in the attic or wherever disembodieds live is lively here.
I have to admit I spent a fair bit of time with my hand over my face but it was mostly because I was ashamed to be watching yet another installment in this sketchy franchise.
Oh my.
It opened to 52 million.
It cost about 87.50 to make.
PA4 we hardly knew you.
There are people who will tell you this is chilling and real. That it’s the scariest movie they’ve ever seen, and how do I explain everything that happened then if it isn’t real?
52 million
Any other questions?
Look, I think I want to believe that there are dark spirits among us. I’ve seen their hats. It’s just that this movie isn’t bringing anything to the table.
It’s fun.
It might make you jump. The fan cam is pretty spooky to be honest.
It just isn’t proof of anything other than our willingness to spend a lot of money on not much at all.
I love the believers.
Why let facts get in the way of the truth?
True story. I had a radio show and we had a fellow on it called Phil The Bad Psychic and small appliance repairman.
Most people got the joke. He could tell your future or predict when your toaster oven would break.
I had a woman call into the show one night. She wanted Phil to tell her whether she should take a new job she was being offered.
I asked her if she understood that his handle was Phil the Bad Psychic.
She did. Then she asked him her question. True story.
It’s real folks. Living proof. See for yourself.
As always, other opinions are welcome, but wrong. That’s it for this week. The cheque’s in the mail and I’m outta here. Paul

Filed Under: Paul Peterson

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